Sunday,  Nov. 10, 2013 • Vol. 16--No. 117 • 13 of 32

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time.
• This brings me to the dilemma flavor of the week.
• Not mentioning any names, I am too much of a gentleman for that, but some person living in my house can be a little tricky when it comes to the usage of language. I may be the "wordsmith" in our house but she definitely is the "word butcher." She can take any word and slice it so thin its meaning all but disappears.
• A while back, we were having a little discussion centering on one of my favorite topics, Apple Fritters. Anybody who knows me knows that an Apple Fritter is at the top of my list of scrumptious delicacies. My motto: An Apple fritter a day makes it all worth living and two turns it into heaven.
• Satan may very well have tempted Eve with an Apple but God has more than made up for that by introducing into humanity a freshly baked Apple Fritter. At least, that is my interpretation. Another theologian in our house has different hermeneutics on the subject.
• In our discussion, I was reminding the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage that she made a promise that if I liked an Apple Fritter I could eat an Apple Fritter. I laid out my argument very clear, at least I thought so, and encouraged her to follow suit.
• She then disrupted the whole discussion by insisting on evidence.
• "When," she said with a very suspicious look on her face, "did I ever say if you liked your Apple Fritter you could eat your Apple Fritter?"
• It was up to me at this point to produce a strategy that would convince her she said exactly that.
• "Don't you remember," I said as confidently as I could possibly muster at the time, "we were at a restaurant and our discussion centered on dessert."
• "I don't remember such an occasion."
• I started to wiggle a little bit but I knew if I could win this argument at this point it would be a great win.
• It is at times like this I wish I was a little more like a politician. A politician can say something and it means different things to different people at different times. It does not matter what they say at any particular time it can always be reinterpreted the way a politician wants it any particular time he needs it. Oh, how I envy those skills.
• Let me point out very quickly that according to common knowledge, this is in no way lying. In fact, I am not sure what the definition of lying is anymore. Nobody lies, they are just being misinterpreted. They can get anybody to believe anything if they rearrange the truth in such a way it is no longer the truth but it is not necessarily a lie.
• "Don't you remember we were talking about dessert," I said as calculatedly as

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