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somebody offers me something free, I know there is a catch somewhere, and as long as I still have a slice of sanity in my noodle soup, nobody is going to catch me.
• Before I had made this a hard and fast rule the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I took a company up on their free offer of three days and two nights in a marvelous resort hotel. "All you have to do," the person on the phone said, "is listen to a short presentation."
• That "short presentation" took exactly three days and two nights. By the time we were done and ready to come home we were exhausted. How many times can you say no, and for it to register in the person to which it is directed? Obviously, from our experience, there is no answer to that question.
• I learned my lesson and have never accepted a free offer since. Not that I have not had the opportunity, I just am highly suspicious of anything that contains that five-letter word "free."
• Recently an event happened that has upgraded my thoughts concerning the word "free."
• The day began as usual, which included a trip to the local grocery store and the bakery department for the obligatory Apple Fritter. A day without an Apple Fritter is a (Continued on page 3)
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